My son died of suicide in 2010. Yesterday i was not alright at all. The pain makes me insane and i black out. Some days are good and i am at peace with God and the Universe.
Whilst i understand the necesity of a grave/tombstone....everytime i see my son's grave i go mad. My family lives on a farm where the graveyard is in the premises.
Please would someone tell me how else to view my son's grave in a positive manner. For now i want to take an axe and smash it into minute pieces. To me, his grave is just an emblem of my sorrow. His grave reminds me that pain has won.
I am disconsolate over my son even though i understand death is part of life here on this Earth.